What is Love?

Today, I think we put far too much pressure on the word LOVE. Love is something that comes in many different forms. It's something I didn't know much about, or didn't think I did, until recently when I realised, I have all the love around me I'm ever going to need. The ancient Greeks had seven different words for love: Eros (Sexual love), Philia (Friendship), Ludus (Flirtatious love), Storge (Family), Philautia (Self-love), Pragma (Companionate), Agape (Universal love). I think this is a much bigger and better way to warrant what love really is. Some people have all of these things, some people may have one or two. But I think since reading this I felt I understood what love was and that I wasn't missing out on being loved or loving someone without having my own Pragma based lover.

Eros. I think this is a fantastic way of showing love. You can be so intimate with somebody and never develop your relationship any further, yet they are providing you with a love that is a sensational gift to your body. It is important with Eros to ensure your lover is feeling the same type of love. Honesty is the best way for Eros and I think a lot of people forget this.

Philia. Friends are something taken for granted by more people than you realise. I for one take my friends for granted because for so long I never had any. I think I often get into my head so much because I'm not used to this huge level of love, I receive from so many people when I never really used to get any. So sometimes, I say things I don't mean and purposely push people away because I think I can be alone. When really, I can't be alone. Not so much cant, but don't want to be.

Pragma. I've only ever been in one relationship; I would never count it as something serious because it came at a time that I was so incredibly lonely that I think I was only really looking for a friend. It was never going to work, and I knew that, but I didn't want to say anything in the fear of being alone. I think all of us fear being alone. I started to realise the situation when I left high school and was surrounded by people a lot more similar to me, people who wanted to spend time with me. This ended my relationship. I did use this person because I was lonely and I have always felt bad about it, but it came at a time when I needed a companion. A person to love me. And I got everything I wanted at a time when I had no one. I like the idea of people being so madly in love, but I think if you start looking for that someone, you will never find them.

Storge. I do honestly think if I didn't have such a caring family behind me at certain points I would've been completely lost. It's amazing how when you're a teenager you forget about how much love your family give you, or at least I certainly did.

Ludus. This type of love is one I find quite confusing because I think it is halfway between Eros and Pragma. I won't say much about this because it's something I don't really understand so if anyone has a suggestion about what this might mean in a modern-day scenario id love to hear it.

Philautia. If you can't love yourself how in the hell you gonna love somebody else. Once you accept yourself and accept other peoples love you can learn to love in all of these different type of ways. It takes a lot of time, but if you look at yourself and pick out one feature your happy with it will start to become clearer as to why others love you.

Agape. Since my sadder times, I've always had a certain few people in my life who have taken away my need for a relationship because I receive companionship and closeness from them that I never knew I needed. I often look at people who go into relationships so quickly they have never had a break from the previous person, and I used to think it was strange that they found a new person so quickly. But it isn't odd, I've started to understand. I was the same. They just need love. If you give out a compliment and a smile you spread love and happiness around to people. You spread it around to people who may be feeling lonely and down about themselves. This universal love is the most important love of all. It's a love that's all about accepting others and yourself for who they/you really are.

I think of my future and plan it as a single person. I look at places I want to travel to, I want to visit, jobs I want to have and don't regard anyone else. The thought of heart break can scare everyone, somebody saying the most unbearable words to you and taking away something that you thought you shared, but relationship heartbreak doesn't scare me. It's the heart break of a friendship. I fear losing these people that I've became so close to over silly things I say because all I have ever been made to feel is a burden. I'm no longer a burden to so many people and the love they give me is something so indescribable and new it makes me flourish.

Love doesn't have to be in these rare forms it can be in the form of some best friends. Whether you see these people ever day or twice a year this is the love that will last a lifetime. This is the love I think everyone needs. And if you have it, don't let it go. Go out and tell people you love them and care for them, because some people need this reassurance more than others.